once upon a time in a bar room far far away, there was a sweet lassie named ginger. ginger, to be frank, was dead broke and was always looking for cash. one day the community's own little orange john belushi (and people think he is food fiending when he goes into rage) was looking for a little more bang for his back. instead of arriving at the local bakery to recieve his daily 1.09 dollar plain doughnut, purchased with a .25 cent pack of butter. Such wages, however, were terrible for him. Finally, he saved up 5 dollars over a period of 7 weeks (not yet 2 months) and went to such a bar room looking for a good time. instead of buying booze however, he found quite the prospect in ginger. after recieving the 'tip' she brought the man with her into the upper bedrooms to get a slightly smaller one, thus 'Thais' was developed. thecoldone thrived alone in his despair, he was also nothing more than dust in the eyes of life.

not being able to outwhore khan (56k brazil connection, btw), is a sad thing. thedarkone began to take form into an actual creature and fell through the netherstorm.

Thais, after being thrown and twisted into the nether of myth, began to build in strength. He fought for the Wolf Pack Gang in the early stages of his life. He created a good Win to Loss ratio, but also a half decent wighty-score. The gods made little notice of him and his ways, a mere grasshopper to them.

However, he was then fired from Wolf-Pack after letting his mouth go all but a little too much. Thais, angry, spent days training alone at the tower of El-D. After gaining in strength, thias begun to evolve into a much powerful creature

Caligula was born. Caligula, through his life time, controled much of Rome. Much like the real Caligula, our hero was also a complete manslut and got his ass beaten down before dying again and again.  Caligula had a completely different form in hopes to hide his shame.


He joined myself in the Mighty Cocks of Bertliham. By the power of Bert we were sent on a quest to fly from the sky on our magic clouds to retrieve the holy grail. In our way, however, were many northmen-clans that stood in our way of reaching our goal. Before our final stand was made, it had been a long time since I had seen Caligula ride into battle with us. His sleeping times put him on an easy nightly watch and always had his own ways of bitching about being benched (yes, it happens when you are on a 16 man roster). Eventually, Caligula left us for reasons unknown, but he is well known by the Current God's for flying with myself and comrades and reaching the 'final stage', but in reality, he wasn't even a factor, though he has been reported as boasting about it.

The New-Gods of the time appeared little interested, but knew about Caligula, but never fully understood how he worked. Some were also faulty, never working at a level that would give them the greatest judgement.


However, a short time later it was reported that he had yet evolved into another form, 'Jotun'.

Jotun, as it was believed, appeared to be more highly developed. Taken under the wing of another cock, fagline, he was transformed into a muslim supreme elitist and bled with his friends in battle. However, the evolution process had appeared to have gone wrong. Jotun appeared as the same player that once was Caligula. Blasphamy it was, and he once again held no effect to his team. A demi-god blessed him with the term '4 baller', but such a blessing was ineffective against the inbred.  Regardless, there is little as to such a thing as a '4 baller', because 5 different rankings, not counting no balls extraordinares is a very terrible scale to rank a person. having 10 levels, however, is much more effective (though there is still only a very constricted scale), and thus is deemed as a level 8 player by this dantski, and an 8 ball to my knowledge are a lot of fun. Jotun, however, is not fun and his pride began to bloom into a flower that glowed so that even the god of the underworld was touched by it's dulling shine. It has grown in his homeland, the land known as Downunder.
In the current age of time, I have heard about his return to battle, but see no difference. His former friendly compainons have been quoted to as labeling him as a level 6 player

You know what that means right? Yes son, you are at the same level as Will -nm-, who is considered one of the most inane players of all time. In the war of  the seven shepards, he appears to have taken sides with former 'fake' cocks so to speak, that also seem to have joined forces with past unsuited opponents of the cocks. Though his testosterone levels may rage, he had once played against his new fellowship. Indeed, this was his only game where he was not beating down on Brazilians who can't even comprehend basic mathematics (yes, yes, 2 + 2 really does equal 4! No, it's not a joke, really. i'm being serious!)

Yes, I'm afraid to bring to your attention that this is my "Retaliation Purge" trading card. Anything said can be easily countered with this trading card. Do not pass go, do not collect 200 dollars, go directly to jail.

My adventure to discover the true fate of the Jotun, has come to a swift end. The reason being, well, is that I have finally reached his home turf. After landing in the land of downunder, it marked the beggining of the end of my journey, and today? Today my friends, I have picked his flower.

overrated people :
jotun ~getting a 4 ball rating from dantski? insane. like he can compete at levels of kugar, cave or sb. pretty good with communication though compared to some other players, but not always the best at following directions. level 6 (3 balls)
adrenaline ~he received three 4 ball ratings but is more like a 7 level clicking ability with the mind of a 2 year old (balls undropped thus questionable). regardless, if he is expected to be a 4 baller then how can he not say that fool is one (I am not saying Fool is a 4 ball player either :o)? the ideal 'a bit' better than average player. barely ever awake or paying attention to team chat. he can complain he's drunk or high, but cw was high for years (many other good players too!) and was consistantly good. adrenaline? consistant? lahl. level 6 for teamplay, which is vital in mwc and most "team" tournaments.  (3 balls)
THOR ~this is called giving 4 balls to pity the mentally challenged right? he can talk about tunnel vision all he wants but it happens to apply to him way too much. not a very good team player. also, gets wrecked by any 4 baller pretty easily. level 6 on his host, level 5 on all others (3 balls/2.5 balls)

sadly, the above players were globally known to have aspects of level 8 players due to the god's utter retardation. they'd really put up a good fight against kilgrath or even verm, i'm sure.

underrated people (i'll keep it at 5):
[note: you can argue the fact of 'bias' here, but that factor was not considered at all in who i chose. if you argue that point, try them out yourself.]
#5 dark angel -last year i saw him as smurf legion's best player by far, this year he has not been as active. i would pick him as a sleeper that has the potential to wake the fuck up and wreak hell all over the place. multitasking and fluid mouse-preset coordination are dark angel's favorite tools.
#4 rawr -widely underrated (probably do to a 'i don't like you' factor) but can manage to do the job and is a great team player in actual tournaments. positive encouragment, enthusiastic morale boosting and being able to have pretty good awareness really helped out DET a lot, especially when THOR couldn't comprehend the english to give clear orders, which by the way, is very necessary when teamed with "ten bastard".
#3 ghengiskhan -i've watched this kid manhandle some poeple and when he appears to be concentrating i seem him as a dante-lightrider-ghengis triplet. no joke, has a good potential to slap level 7 niggas around.
#2 karma -probably one of the best ww2 converts of all time, many people underestimate karma and see him as that 'high ranked ww2 player that things he can run shit'. well this nigga can run train and is an excellent team player.
#1 Trixta Np -this champ is rated at level 6 but he walks over level 7 and 8 players everytime he clicks his mouse. consistantly underrated despite being known to drop entire teams of mwc champs with the sight of his 3 trow. notorious for blonde hair, brown eyes and big assets.

overrated teams:
Assorted Superhero Squad
Northern Plaid Civil Fellowship of nerds
myth blooper allstars

underrated teams:
real men alliance
wacky delly
ageha

^--- the real bellcurve ladies and gentlemen.


goodday, goodnight.